Friday, May 19, 2006

The Hank Keene Show


Mr. ZZ and Daughter Z did this skit at a talent show this year.

Hank:
Hi folks! We would like to do our own abbreviated version of a 1936 radio show starring Hank Keene.

In 1936 radio was king and Hank Keene was one of its shining stars.

Yes Hank Keene was a cowboy singer, not a country western singer, a cowboy singer.

Now I got to warn you the songs will be doing tonight are kind ah corny, so think of these songs as a musical journey and not a destination.

Will be doing part of one of his songs and a part of one that we made up to be done by his radio gang called “The Connecticut Hill-Billys”.

We won’t be totally accurate to the time period but – wait a minute.

How many of you ever heard the show?

Can you get a count?

Miss
Oh no:
1,2,3,4,5, ah nobody.


Hank:
Nobody?

Miss
Oh no:
Ya Nobody.


Hank:
OK, well then this will be a historically accurate representation of the show worthy of a doctorate.

Hay they’ll never know.

Miss
Oh no:
Right!


Hank:
Anyway on his show he also had “Miss Ohio,” Jean Fadden.

I don’t have a Miss Ohio but I got a Miss Oh no to do her part.

All be the handsome cowboy singer and at times will step out of character to do someone else.

Back in 1936 cowboy singers would yodel in a part of some of their songs.
You might ask, “What is yodeling?”

Can you help the folks out with that Miss Oh no.

Miss
Oh no:
According to Webster’s Dictionary: Yodel to sing or call out with frequent changes from the ordinary voice to falsetto and back again.

Hank:
Thanks, I can’t yodel but I’ll have Miss Oh no do all the Yodeling tonight…

Miss
Oh no:
What a minute!

I’m not doing nooooooo yodeling!

Hank:
No?

Miss
Oh no:
No!


Hank:
No?

Miss
Oh no:
Nooo!


Hank:
OK ah folks because of time restraints there will be no yodeling tonight.
So with out any further ado here we go with the “Hank Keene Show”

Hi folks and welcome to WRDO’s broadcast of the Hank Keene Show.

Brought to you by or 3 fine sponsors.

The itchy butt phychic
If you wan’t to know when it will tingle,
Give us a jingle.

And Doris’s day old donates.
Every bit as nutritious as fresh.

And Wheat Block
If you’re blocked?
It won’t help.
No.
That’s why they call it Wheat Block.

Now Miss Oh no was suppose to sing a nasally hill-billy part to this first song.

But her own sense of good taste and what she’d do for no pay won out so she will be assisting me to do the part instead.

Won’t you Miss Oh no.

Miss
Oh no:
(Miss Oh no nods yes as she slips on a glove.)


Hank:
Well You’ll see what I mean.


(Miss Oh no uses her gloved hand to hold Hanks noise at every *.)

Song:

[C] Let the Moon shine down * Let the Moon shine down

Let the Moon shine [F] down * Let the Moon shine down

Let the Moon shine [C] down, From [G] above.

Will be married [C] soon -neath the harvest [F] moon.

Let the [C] Moon shine [G] down from [C] above.

(Step to side for solo and end song.)

F C F G C5 G5 END C G C G C


Hank:
Lets hear it for Earl on mandolin. Might pretty there Earl.

Thank you, thank you.

Now I think I hear our own Connecticut hill-billys coming on stage.

My goodness what do you have there.

Miss
Oh no:
That’s my brand new citified gee tar.

It’s a city gee tar because I found it…in the city.

Yes sir absolutely brand new…
To me anyway.

Hank:
Can you play that thing?

Miss
Oh no:
Why sure! Ya wanna hear somethin?

Hank:
Sure!

Miss
Oh no:
I call this one the Sweet Honey Dew…Melon
(Starts to strum it badly Hank puts a hand on the strings to stop her.)

Hank:
Wait a minute know, whoa.

Why don’t you play the spoons like you usually do.

Now that’s what you shine at.

Miss
Oh no:
You want me to do what I usually do?

Hank:
Yes, that’s right.

Miss
Oh no:
And what I shine at?

Hank:
Why sure that’s right.

Miss
Oh no:
OK


(She goes and gets a couple of jars and hands one to me as she starts to drink from the other.)

Hank:
Now what a minute now, what’s all this?

Miss
Oh no:
Well you told me you wanted me to shine and this hear is some of the best moon-

Hank:
(Hank puts a hand to her mouth to stop her from talking.)

Don’t say it, why this is 1936 prohibition. We can’t have you saying things like that.

What I meant why don’t you play the spoons that’s what you’re good at

Miss Oh no:
Ok.
Hank:
Oh here comes the rest of the hill-billys now..

So I’ll give the stage over to them now.

(Step into character)


Song

To [C] France in the [G]spring I’ve never [C] been.

Never seen the Roman [F] Coliseum

[C] But there’s one [G] place I have [C] been.

I’ve been to [G] Buckland [C] Mall.



[C] They got stuff you can buy there.

They got stuff you can perches [G] too.

[C] And if you’re nice and have some luck.

They might even [G] say thank [C] you.

END CGCGC

All:
Thanks and good night.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Crazy Words, Crazy Tune Lyrics: Jack Yellen Music: Milton Ager

[G] There's a guy I'd [D7] like to kill
[G] If he doesn't [D7] stop I will
[G[ He's got a uku- [C] le-[G] le, and a voice that's [D7] loud and [G]shrill

[C] 'Cause he lives next [G7] door to me
[C] And he keeps me [G7] up till three
[C] With his uku- [G7] le-[C] le and a [A7] funny mel- o- [D7] dy

Chorus:
[G] Crazy words, crazy tune
All that you'll ever hear him croon
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o, doe[G] Vo-doe doe [D7]

[G] Sits around, all night long
Sings the same words to every song
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o, [G] doe

His uku-[B7] lele, daily
[E7] How he'll strum!
Bum bum bum!
[A7] Vampin' and stampin'
[D7] Then he hollers, "Black bottom!"

[G] Crazy words, crazy tune
He'll be driving me crazy soon
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o, [G] doe [D7]



[G] I have begged that [D7] guy to stop
[G] I have even [D7] called a cop [G]
Told my dog "Go [C] sic [G] him", but that [D7] dog wouldn't [G] go

[C] But tonight will [G7] be the end
[C] Yes siree, 'cause [G7] I intend
[C] To go up and [G7] kick [C] him in the [A7] vo doe doe de oh [D7] doe


Chorus:
[G] Napoleon marched his men
Turned around and he said to them
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe [D7]

[G] Washington, Valley Forge
Man, 'twas cold but spoke George
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o, [G] doe

Remember [B7] Patrick Henry
[E7] In That speech, famous speech
Cried, [A7] "Give me, give me
[D7] "Liberty or black bottom!"

[G] You all heard yesterday
What did President Coolidge say
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe

He's got to[B7] stop it, stop it
[E7] Yes he must, or I'll just
[A7] Kill him, I'll kill him [D7] Then I'll do the black bottom



[G] When I'm jailed, upon my knee
To the jury and the judge I'll plead
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe [D7]

[G] Now the minuet, [D7] quiet bliss
[G] Calm and peaceful, it [D7] went like this
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe [D7]

[G] The Polka [D7] too was a treat
[G] Your partner said if you [D7] tread on his feet
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe

The gliding [B7] Foxtrot we've got
[E7] And the blues, if you choose [A7]
We've got the Charleston
[D7] And we'll soon have Black Bottom

[G] Our vicar [D7] said, "Ah, me
[G] Friends, our hymn for to- [D7] night will be
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe [D7]


Chorus:
[G] It's a rage, it's a craze
Everybody sings now-a-days
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe [D7] Vo doe doe

[G] Every goof, every sheik
Tunes his uke and begins to shriek
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe

Go on the [B7] east side, the west side
[E7] Here or there, everywhere
[A7] They vo doe, vo doe doe
[D7] Then they holler, "Black bottom!"

[G] Young or old, old or young
The guy that started it should be hung
[A7] Vo doe de o, [D7] vo doe doe de o,[G] doe

[A7] [D7] [G] [A7] [D7] [G]